Monday, July 24, 2017

"List of Rules For Surviving Zombieland...."

"No, my friends:  This is now the United States of Zombieland.  It's amazing how quickly things can go from bad to total shit-storm!  Why am I alive, when everyone around me has turned to meat?  It's because of my list of rules.

Rule #1 for surviving Zombieland: Cardio!

....As the infection spread and the chaos grew, it wasn't enough to be fast on your feet, you had to get a gun and learn how to use it. Which leads me to my Second Rule, the Double Tap.....don't get all stingy with your bullets.....woulda, coulda, shoulda....

Don't let them catch you with your pants down.  Rule #3 Beware of Bathrooms.....

As zombies began to outnumber humans, you had to sever all emotional ties....You have to focus on your own survival. Which leads to Rule #4 - pretty basic:  Fasten your seatbelts!  It's going to be a bumpy ride!"  Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg)/Zombieland

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